Monday, November 24, 2008

Someone has stolen your heart!

Tempe- A young resident was shocked to find a ransom note taped to her door early Saturday evening.

Upon arrival at the specified location, she was met by a small and sinister man clearly associated with the plot. He told her that he could guide her on with a clue but that she would first have to complete a task for him. She was given a balloon, and told to blow it up. After that she was instructed to draw the face of her boyfriend on the balloon. She was then supposed to demonstrate her first kiss. After her first attempt, the mean man popped her balloon claiming that it did not accurately portray her boyfriend. He did however redeem himself in a small way by blowing up the second balloon for her. She then proceeded to demonstrate her first kiss. She received her next clue, which led to the home of a neighbor, and a monkey from build a bear.

At the new location, the young woman was met by a jolly sort clad in an Arizona Diamondbacks uniform. This man informed her that she would be hitting five baseballs to receive her next clue, however, if the man caught one of the balls that she hit, she would be forced to start over, and if she were to strike out, the game would end and she would have to wait a week to try again. After a handful of pitches the girl eagerly awaited what would be her fifth and final hit. She hit the ball and it gently glided straight into the hands of the jovial pitcher. Who proceeded to give her the clue anyway, along with a stuffed dog dressed in a diamondbacks uniform.This clue guided her to the church where she had been baptized.

As the chauffeur pulled up to the church, a very nice young couple was waiting. They eagerly described the girls next task. She would fill in all the information to her baptismal program. Upon completion of the task, the girl was informed that she had indeed finished properly and that her next destination would be the temple. She also received a bear in a baptism dress.

The girl suspected that her journey was about to come to an end, and was shocked to find not the man that she expected but rather a cheerful man with yet another clue. To obtain this clue, the young lady had to arrange sentence strips containing the plan of slavation, in the proper order. After a short while, she was done. Although she was not as confident as she had been with other tasks, she had indeed properly placed each step. The clue she gained led her to Taco Bell.

At Taco Bell, the girl was met by the same young couple that had met her earlier at the church. They sat near two cups full of mild sauce packets. She was asked to search through the cups to find the three packets with a special message, each was marked with a star. As she sifted endlessly through what seemed like hundreds of packets of mild sauce, she thought that she would never find the special sauces. Close to giving up hope, the girl finally found one star, and then another, and then the final star. The packets said, make a wish, ta-dah, and the feeling is mutual. The girl was then given a clue leading her back to the temple. She also got a veil, that would transform her baptism bear into a bride bear.

As the chauffeur approached the temple, she pulled up to the curb and instructed the girl to get out. The girl was a little unsure, but complied anyway. After walking around the temple grounds, she finally saw standing in a ray of light, the cruel man who had stolen her heart. He was dressed nicely, and his demeanor did not seem as cruel as the ransom note had depicted him. As she approached, he spoke.

"You went through a lot of trouble to get your heart back."

"Yes I did."

"Unfortunately you can't have it back. I plan on keeping it for eternity. However I am willing to make a compromise, and you can have my heart for eternity as well."

With that the man dropped to his knee, swept the hat off his magic bear, revealing a ring and queried,

"Will you marry me?"

The girl quickly responded in the affirmative.

The man then escorted her to his truck. There was a dozen roses waiting with taco bell mild sauce packets, that said will you marry me, decoratively placed among the roses.

The girl has declined to press charges according to one authority close to the case.

That is right folks, she said yes, and I am now officially engaged!!